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just only john

 

one remains
besides me
four follow
for now
lessons of loss
requirement for love
we loved
beyond most
continuing
whispers
nudges
pets
lovers

i learned to long at an early age
dad

i learned about loss
divorce

i grieve
for time
words
moods

i learn by listening
this here
writing
tap tap typing
is an affliction
a call
brightest red laser beam pointed into the heavens
on the coast of spain
i collapsed under the beauty
as a young man
abroad
awakened by stars waves and bruce springstein

i can try to take you there
but language fails
time is all at once
we just need the juice
spice
desire

i say we
i mean me

i lose everything three times a day
like a frog leg in the rain
pain is a lesson
in humility

and

what makes us human2

mom
afraid to fall
died peacefully surrounded by
god
i hope

brother
drove his alfa romeo into a ditch
walked away
four or five times
died of lung cancer and alcoholism
wooden mexican teeth
and spark of humor in the failing light of his time
on earth
even he is here
among the ruins i am collecting
celebrating really
opening to

sister
my sister
sister
sister
sister
sister

fell at christmas
blew out all the joy
like twinkling lights
no longer connected

sister
brother
mother
dad

me

just only john

 

*i am here* < index page

© 2023 – a walt whitman ai poem by human john mcelhenney

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